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Today's Big Stuff

7.14.20

It's Tuesday. There are 112 days until the presidential election. Ivanka launches letthemeatcake.com as Republicans tell the unemployed to go fuck themselves, 5.4 million have lost their health insurance and President FullofShit hits a big milestone.

Note: Who doesn't love a Tuesday? Well, us. And presumably Chance the Rapper. Yeah, we're gonna take a second to talk about this silly shit. If you didn't see it, Chance went to twitter yesterday to promote Kanye's ridiculous non-campaign and trash Joe Biden. It didn't go well. Still, dude stuck to his guns until Terry Crews came in to get his back, and then he backed off fast. The whole thing was kinda hilarious except it left us with the same nagging feeling we used to get when we'd see Susan Sarandon attacking Hillary. We had a pretty intense primary season this year. Lots of folks were passionate about someone other than Joe Biden. But Biden is the nominee. And he has moved swiftly to listen and incorporate ideas from those other campaigns. As Michelle Golderg pointed out yesterday, it's crazy to think there's a coalition in American politics that includes Bill Kristol (who sucks) and Angela Davis (who rocks). Whatever problems people might have with Joe, it's undeniable that there is something cool happening here. People are coming together, united behind the purpose of ridding America of her idiot gameshow host president. As we all climb in this big boat together, there are going to be those who are just so smart and just so special that they know so much more about this stuff then the rest of us. They might go their own way in their little dinghy, or they might turn around and try to ram us. Either way, keep rowing. It's the only way to get where we're going. We'll let history deal with Chance the Rapper and Jill Stein the Awful Human Being. More: The Daily Beast

Note two: Tucker Carlson is taking a planned vacation. As CNN's Andrew Kaczynski pointed out, it's pretty amazing that he planned it for the same time his senior writer had to resign for being a racist misogynist scumbag. If you saw his response last night, you saw a white supremacist who didn't think his writer did anything wrong except get caught. The real bad guys, according to Tucker, are the people who exposed it and celebrated it when a racist asshole lost his job. The people on the news side of Fox own this too. More: CNN

Note three: Yeah, we'll probably read the Mary Trump book. It seems noteworthy that there's a Trump who can read or write, so we want to support that. More: The Daily Beast

Note four: SCOTUS didn't schedule the Obamacare case for the next arguments. Why? Because they've been politicized and don't want Trump arguing in court just before the election that the ACA needs to be struck down. Which is weird because hacky Washington reporters keep telling us what an institutionalist John Roberts is. 

Note five: Don't read this if you've just eaten. More: Axios

Note six: This one either. More: ProPublica

Note seven: Bubonic plague squirrels. Well that's just fucking great. As if things weren't already scary enough out there these days. Be safe, everybody. We love y'all, and we hope you're holding up ok amid all this craziness. For what it's worth, you smell like success and candy. Have a great day. More: ABC News

LOL

That's really the only thing we could think of to say in response to Princess Ivanka's idiotic new ad campaign for the uemployed: FindSomethingNew.org. We make a lot of jokes, but we swear we're not making that up. It's a real thing. We hear they were gonna go with FuckTheJobless.org or JustBorrowMoneyFromDaddy.org, but the domain names had already been snatched up. It's like BeBest but dumber somehow. Guess we know the Donald isn't attracted to brains. Just his own fucking moron daughter. This absurdity comes as unemployed Americans are about to lose their COVID benefits and Republicans say they have zero interest in extending them. In fact, Mitch's only priority seems to be making sure that companies can't be sued if they force you back to work and you get sick. Maybe if Mitch's members drop another point or two, he'll start to get the message. That seems unlikely so let's beat their asses at the polls. More: Associated Press, CNN, Bloomberg

That's a big number

The NYT tells us that about 5.4 million Americans lost their health insurance in the pandemic. And still the administration is suing to take healthcare away from millions more. It's kind of obvious by now that Republicans don't want us to be healthy and really don't give a damn if we live or die. Look at what they're doing to Fauci. Have you ever seen anything more disgusting? Dude has served like 50 presidents, and he's trying to get it right. So the only plan they have, as far as we can tell, is to fire Fauci, tell us how great Trump is doing and then force us back to school and work with a big fact "oh well" waiting in case you get sick. Fuck these assholes. More: New York Times, The Daily Beast, Bloomberg, Axios, Washington Post

Congrats?

The most dishonest president in American history reached a huge milestone last week. On July 9, according to the Washington Post, Trump told his 20,000th lie to the American people. Of course they say false or misleading, but we don't have to worry about kissing ass for access so we just call him a fucking liar. WaPo says it took Trump 827 days to lie to us 10,000 times. But he was able to double that in just 440 days. It might be his only impressive achievement. Sadly, the White House press corps believes some silly idea that they aren't allowed to call lies lies or liars liars, and so this will continue. What do we think? 30,000 by Election Day? More: Washington Post

Today's clips

The Republican National Committee and President Donald Trump's campaign say they have now hired 1,500 field staffers, aiming to convert their financial advantage over Democrats into votes in November.
More: Associated Press

Education Secretary Betsy DeVos is holding three virtual meetings this week with members of the conservative Federalist Society, prompting the nation's largest teachers union to criticize her for spending time on political events rather than plans for reopening schools shuttered by the pandemic.
More: Politico

Brett Giroir, the federal official overseeing coronavirus testing efforts, says that his experience working on vaccine development projects at Texas A&M University helped prepare him for this historic moment. He once said that his vaccine effort was so vital that "the fate of 50 million people will rely on us getting this done."
More: Washington Post

Even at the time it was written, the fundamental proposition offered by Vice President Pence in his Wall Street Journal piece on June 16 was dubious. No second wave of the coronavirus pandemic was emerging, he wrote — an obviously true claim only because the first wave had not ended.
More: Washington Post

The House is planning to quickly revisit its effort to obtain President Donald Trump's personal financial records, urging the Supreme Court on Monday night to take its final formal steps on the matter so lawmakers can reignite the issue in the lower courts.
More: Politico

President Donald Trump swept to power by championing the hardships of forgotten men and women, but his re-election bid has so far centered on the plight of just one person: himself.
More: Bloomberg

Joe Biden's campaign is debuting its first general election television ad in Texas on Tuesday, dipping its toes in a state long considered a Republican stronghold and one that's seen an uptick in Covid-19 cases in recent weeks. 
More: CNN

A Des Moines Register journalist arrested while covering a protest is asking a judge to order prosecutors to produce evidence of the crime they say she committed — or drop the case.
More: Des Moines Register

 

 



 

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